He had her daydreaming more than she was willing to admit. His ability to put her mind at ease and to calm her tormented heart intrigued her. He was everything she never knew she wanted and needed; the light to the darkest of her days. She was so happy in his presence and in his arms at night that she almost recoiled again. But she didn’t. For the first time in a long time, she allowed herself to be completely vulnerable; totally in love.
She had met him in high school. They never spoke much, but she was aware of his presence, as he was hers. Life moved on. She married and had kids; he had a child of his own. One day, many years later, he sent her a sweet, brief message online. Immediately, she was drawn to his sincerity and wished she could oblige him. At the time, she was in a complicated relationship. One that she would realize (much later than she should have) was only meant to serve as a temporary happiness; a distraction of sorts. But they kept acquainted through friendly messages; conversations she always enjoyed. Until one evening when she encountered him in person.
Walking into a local hangout one Thursday night, she was slightly uneasy (as she was once again trying to find her place in this small town that she had left right out of high school). She spotted him. Tall, dark, handsome, and might I add, charming. He fit the bill to a T. He gave her a hug and proceeded to buy her a drink. As she sat next to him and they began talking, something sparked inside her. As cliché as it sounds, she felt as if they were the only two people in that crowded, noisy bar. He made her laugh and reminded her of the person she used to be, the person she wanted to be. She didn’t want that feeling to end; that blissful moment that made her insides crumble like she was a teenage girl with her first crush.
After that evening spent in his company, she realized deep down that it wasn’t merely a crush. She would see him a few months later and the interaction was the same…seamless, fun, and left her wanting more. They had developed a friendship that she cherished and it became apparent her feelings for him were there to stay. Three days after their second face to face encounter, he messaged her. It was perfect timing, really, as she had been crying that entire day over an incident that happened with her boyfriend at the time. He invited her to take a drive with him. They talked about their kids, about music, about mutual friends, and life in general. The laughter and smooth conversation made her forget she had even shed one tear that day.
Over the next 15 months, she struggled a lot. She fell for him and although she tried, the imprint he left on her soul was one that couldn’t be erased. However, those unadulterated type of feelings scared her away. In her heart, she felt that once she gave her all to him, there would be no turning back. He was truly a man she could see herself building the rest of her life with. He was always there when she needed a listening ear, some kind words, and a good genuine laugh. And in true gentleman fashion, he patiently stepped aside when her hesitations got the best of her.
The beauty of this story (that happens to have been my life for the past almost two years), is that patience pays off. They say true love always has a habit of coming back. It took me almost losing him completely to realize he was all I could see for my future. I do now believe in the saying that some men’s role in a woman’s life, is to make her a better woman for another man. I am now that better woman, and have found the person deserving of my best self.
To those of you who have been following my blog thus far and have perhaps been wondering why I’ve been a little MIA, it’s simply because I’ve been allowing myself to live completely in the moment. The happiness, the love, and the normalcy I’ve been able to enjoy lately, have given me a thousand new reasons to be grateful. Here’s to love…..newfound love; unexpected love; love that wasn’t meant to be and led us to stronger love; and love that reshapes our entire core.
“You are going to come across people in your life who will inspire you, love you and change you; and that is a rare thing, but every once in a while you will come across someone who will completely rob you from your sleep and those are the people who are just too beautiful to put into words.” ~ R.M. Drake
“He broke down her walls without her even noticing. And when he rebuilt the walls, he added windows to let the sunshine in.” ~ Annonymous